I think we’re gonna take backsies on daycare. Yup, Hayes at daycare’s days may be numbered. It’s just too hard — and for the month and a half Hayes has been there he’s been sick too much.
Let me paint the latest picture for you: Jen goes to California on business last Tuesday. Thursday morning I get a call from her, she’s got the flu. Thursday evening, I get a call from Hayes’ daycare — he’s got a fever. I leave work at 3:30 to pick him up. I call Jen — I can’t miss work on Friday, as we have a VC coming in and the CEO wants me there. Jen changes her plan — she gets a red eye Thursday night, arrives Friday morning — and is so sick she needs to be wheeled to baggage claim (I wish that were a joke, but it’s not). She arrives home around 8am. I tell her to sleep. At 11 she wakes up and I go to work. Her and Hayes spend a sleepy day together.
On Saturday, Jen sleeps for most of the day. Hayes sleeps a lot too. I try my best to do what I’m worst at — taking care of the house. On Sunday, Jen conjures up some strength and helps out with Hayes. I get out to do some breif grocery shopping while they both sleep.
Ok, here’s the kicker — Jen has to leave for NYC yesterday on another business trip. She’s still sick. Hayes is still sick. Jen calls the woman we had been talking to about a possible — now very real — nanny position. She’s free, so she comes over to watch Hayes. I work out of my office at home for the day. Phew. Jen gets back today, and last night she said she was feeling better. Today, Hayes is at daycare again. Hopefully, that’ll last the day.
End game? Nanny. I think. Stay tuned.
Madeleine says:
March 28th, 2006 at 9:54 am
Hi Eric (and Jennifer),
The daycare germs are definitely a tough haul. Flexible jobs help, but it’s hard to pick up all the slack. The sickness frequency will probably go down after the first major cold season, so if the nanny doesn’t work out you should find Hayes is sick less often by fall, I hope. I personally screwed it all up by moving to a new city when S. was 4. We had a year of monthly illnesses, every childhood infection you can imagine, including hand, foot, and mouth disease (not a big deal), scarlet fever (strep) and many more. Knock on wood, she’s been fine mostly for this second year here so I think we have completed the adjustment. Phew.
Glad to hear everyone is feeling better today! Fingers crossed that you don’t succumb now . . .
ieatcrayonz says:
March 28th, 2006 at 10:58 am
I had to read the phrase “She’s free” over and over again. I kept thinking, “Where in the heck did they find a nanny for FREE?”
It finally sunk in, so I’ve shelved the daggers of jealousy for the time being.
We now return you to our regular programming…
Eric Sagalyn says:
March 28th, 2006 at 10:59 am
LOL. She’s free — like twice the price free!
Jon says:
March 28th, 2006 at 12:39 pm
That’s one of the reasons we’re struggling so much right now….one income instead of two. We don’t want to use daycare. It’s toooo expensive and the kids are always always sick.
4 or 5 more years until public schooling starts and we can resume our lives of two incomes.
- Jon
- Daddy Detective
- www.daddydetective.com
AdventureDad says:
March 29th, 2006 at 2:51 am
So sorry to hear aobut your bad luck. Daycare often leads to more sickness and it can be really tough. We also had the choice of hiring a nanny or just have my wife take care of our son since she doesn’t work. But we decided on daycare since we feel like the social interaction is extremely important. Daycare over here in Sweden costs almost nothing but even if we had to pay large money I think it would be worth it. I’ve seen people who do the nanny thing and I would not want my son to do that because of the lack of scoial interaction.. Our son has fortunately been sick very little in his six months at daycare. Getting sick is painful but for the kid it’s a neccessary evil every now and then.
Best of luck with whatever you decide to do
AD
KnitGirlNYC says:
March 29th, 2006 at 11:38 am
Free Nanny? Yeah, we’ve got one — Grandma! Bless her heart; she comes over to our apartment every morning to care for our 8-month-old daughter. She actually has been coming to our home to care for my children since my son was an infant (and she had to come in to Manhattan where we were living from Brooklyn, like all the way in by Staten Island). When I had to go back to work from my 2nd maternity leave, I enrolled my son to daycare so Grandma would only have to deal with 1 bambino.
About daycare and sickness — it’s inevitable. Of course, if daycare is taking a major toll on H’s health, then you should consider taking her out of it. On the other hand, if H was anything like my son (took him weeks before he was toally adjusted), then you would also have to consider sacrificing that progress if you were to take her out. My son has not had a dry nose since he started daycare in September. I personally don’t think it’s that big of a deal; kids get sick regardless and that only builds up their immune system (and again, I’m referring to common colds, etc). As long as she’s happy, learning and not really, really sick, I’d say let H stay in daycare. B (he’s going on 3 in June) loves his daycare (and I can tell that he learns a lot from it) and I’m glad I didn’t take my in-laws’ suggestion to take him out of it. BTW, did you talk to your pediatrician about this?
KnitGirlNYC says:
March 29th, 2006 at 11:40 am
Sorry, I referred Hayes as “her”. Him Him Him!!!
Cameron says:
March 30th, 2006 at 5:09 pm
The sick thing is, sadly, part of daycare. Lucas started on a Monday, and by the Thursday his first cold had arrived. That said, he loves the place, loves his little buddies, and I think it makes us better parents when we’re with him. Also I’m with KnitGirlNYC about the building of the immune system and the fact that they get sick no matter what. We have friends that have kids who stay at home, and they pick up all sorts of things all the time. The rushing to the daycare thing sucks though. The daycare can’t/won’t give him Tempra/Tylenol/whatever for you?
Decisions like this are easier for us here in in the Autonomous Region of Qubeconia (still part of Soviet Canuckistan), our daycare is subsidized, so it costs us about $170ish a month.
Cameron says:
April 1st, 2006 at 7:32 am
Wow, I killed the comment thread.
nadine says:
April 23rd, 2006 at 8:08 pm
We’ve had our kid in daycare since she was 3 months old. She’s 16 months old now and we’re finally sick of the illnesses and are going the nanny route as well. Its not just the snuffy noses either - if it were just that I’d be fine. If they were truly building up their immune systems shouldn’t I already be immune to what she gets instead of catching everything? She does have fun and learns stuff there and socializes but we’ll work it out. Good luck with the nanny.
Barbara says:
May 2nd, 2006 at 9:43 am
I’ve been surfing the web to find out if my son’s constant sickness is normal for a daycare baby. My son started institutional daycare in February when he was 6 months old. He’s now 9 months old and I haven’t worked a full week yet. I’m wondering if it’s all worth it? I even work from home one day a week and my mother watches him one day a week. I guess my retorical question is how often is too often for a child to be sick. He was in daycare 1 1/2 days last week and by Saturday he had an infection in his eye due to a cold. So I guess he’ll only be in daycare 2 days this week despite paying for 5 days a week.
Any words of wisdom? I feel like a terrible mother and employee. Does it end?