Hayes has been admitted to Childrens for observation. Mom has volunteered to spend the night, as they only allow one parent to. I, being the odd man out, am wrinting to you from home. I miss them.
Today was an ordeal — technically, I guess it was yesterday. We went in to see our pediatrician who recommended we go to the emegency room to seek another opinion from someone who may have seen this type of thing before. We went and were immediately admitted. What followed was scary and humiliating.
More truama questions. Hayes was then given a CT (cat scan). Good news — fabulous news — no fracture, so this is not brain related. However, since this was an unexplained head truama, Hayes was treated as if he might be abused. So much for innocent until proven guilty. It was humiliating. We spoke with a social worker, which wasn’t the bad part. I understand the importance of that. The bad part is that then Hayes had to get a FULL BODY xray. We, at first, thought there was some medical reason. It quickly became apparent that there was only one — to prove we had not abused Hayes, which one of the residents later cheerfully admitted to us.
The full body xray was not one xray, as we had assumed, but almost 20 of Hayes’ various parts. Hayes screamed, puked (the spinning head exorcist type puke) and I cried. It was awful. I have never felt less self worth in my life. Jen and I were pissed. No, that’s not quite right. We were fuming. Why did Hayes need to be subjected to all this excess harmful radiation in his fomative months? To prove we had not abused him. So instead of us abusing him, the hospital did a bit of abusement. Fucking ridiculous.
After that, we went upstairs and were admitted. The staff of three pediatricians came by and one looked familiar. It was the NICU resident that I had met when Hayes was first born. She remembered us, and how Hayes was so huge compared to the premature babies. They explained that what Hayes has is likely something that babies get when suction is used on them in a vaginal birth. It was also possible cause by trauma when this late in life. And by trauma, they explained, it could have been just a slight bonk on the head that wouldn’t have even bothered Hayes. You know, when your putting the kid in the car seat and accidently hit his head on the handle and you go “oh shit, sorry!” and baby goes “gah!” and continues smiling like nothing has happened? That has happened. Hardly abusive.
Anyway, I feel like Hayes and Jen are in good hand right now. I also still feel violated. But most of all, I am just happy that it looks like Hayes will be just fine. Happier than I can possibly express.
BTW, did I mention that they scheduled that MRI tomorrow afternoon?
Lori says:
March 10th, 2005 at 1:17 am
I know there is nothing I could say to make you guys feel better about this. It is hell, I know, our daughter was hospitalized a good part of her first year. I hope tomorrow is a better day for your little man.
Universal Hub says:
March 10th, 2005 at 8:12 am
Baby update
The good news is that the swelling at the back of Eric’s son’s head probably isn’t serious. The bad news is what the family had to go through when he was admitted to Children’s yesterday - a battery of X
Cameron says:
March 10th, 2005 at 8:15 am
Ok, remember where I said that they were just doing their job when asking about abuse? How it was just a sign of them being on the ball? Screw that. Asking is one thing. Looking at the kid all over is another, a full body xray is just legal ass covering bullshit. Clearly I’m not a doctor, but in a kid that small I would guess that very little that an abuser could do to them wouldn’t show up with a thorough external exam.
I’m so sorry that you guys have had to go through all of this.
Hope that it all gets better and easier from here.
Jennifer says:
March 10th, 2005 at 8:49 am
So sorry to hear that you have to go through all of this BS. It sounds like you and Jen are handeling it rather well givin the situation. The good news is that they are in good hands.
Alexander -S- says:
March 10th, 2005 at 5:30 pm
Hope the H bomb gets out of hospital soon and all is well. As a V new parent (Still adjusting to the life change
i feel your concern and my thoughts are with you and your family.
(On a lighter note - one day i aspire that my humble little attempt at a blog will even meet the high standards of More Diapers!)
Mary says:
March 10th, 2005 at 6:07 pm
Hey Eric…Your Mom mentioned your blog site, and I’ve been enjoying reading all about little Hayes. I am very sorry to hear about this recent development. How anyone could think that you or Jen could possibly abuse Hayes is beyond me. It makes me angry just to think about it. I agree that it is invasive to xray a child that many times, especially when they could have talked to your pediatricians, who it sounds like you guys have been in pretty close contact with.
I hope that Hayes, and you guys, are all feeling better soon. Stay positive.
Lisa Williams says:
March 11th, 2005 at 2:14 am
Deep sigh. Yep. I took my three year old to Mt. Auburn after he took a header off the couch. The staff didn’t treat us with suspicion, but I worried that they would, and I think it’s sad now that any parent that takes their kid to the ER has to think about whether they will get sucked into the social services system just for trying to get their kid some medical attention.
melissa says:
March 11th, 2005 at 4:00 am
Hang in there. Babies are more resilient than you think.
Sarcastic Journalist says:
March 11th, 2005 at 11:53 pm
I’m really sorry. I understand the “need” but at the same time, I think it is HORRIBLE.