As a new dad, there are few things more important to me than protecting my child from indecent material. So I’m very excited about The New Vigilance of the FCC and the NFL on the Super Bowl. If the HBomb were a bit older when last years escapade (get it, Escapade?) happened I’m not sure how I would explain it to him. I guess I would have to say something like, “Well, Hayes, that’s a breast. Woman have breasts.” Of course, that’s assuming that he had seen the milisecond of breast during the football game or perhaps the 6 hours of replays on the networks, news channels, ESPN and likely children’s programming.

Fortunately for us new and not-so-new parents, we no longer have to deal with such indecency. Nope. All we have to do now is try to explain Erectile Dysfunction. I’ve figured that out, though. I’m just going to say something like, “Well Hayes, sometimes men’s penises don’t work so well, so in order to get them ready to insert into the woman, they need to take these drugs.” If he ask why, I have a good answer for that, too. I’m going to say, “Sometimes men have a problem other times they no longer find their wives attractive or have a mistress and need a little extra help.”

Yup. It’s a good thing about the FCC and NFL protecting us from breasts. If only they could do the same with the boobs.

GO PATS!